After learning the horrific details of why my OBGYN was banned from delivering in any hospital, I made peace with the fact that no other doctor would take me in for care since I was due in a couple of weeks. I was going to have to accept that whoever was on call at the hospital was going to deliver my baby.
Antonio was snug as a bug and didn’t want to come out. I didn’t want to be induced, I wanted to do this entire birth without medication or epidurals, but they don’t encourage you to go past 41 weeks because the health risks become greater for you and baby.
Plus, I was done. My ankles were swollen, and I was uncomfortable and ready to meet my son. The last two weeks of pregnancy sucked, to be honest.
We were admitted and I was induced, but not with Pitocin, it was something less in strength. I remember them saying if this didn’t work, they would have to administer Pitocin. I remember lots of women, including my own sister, complaining of how painful the Pitocin contractions were. I also remember them telling me that being induced could take a day or two and for my husband to rest that first night, so he could be there for me when I needed him.
I labored naturally, with no epidural, for over 15 hours. All night while my husband tried to sleep, I experienced such painful contractions, but I stayed strong. I remember begging him to sleep so he could be awake and strong when I needed him. I could do this. I was strong, fit and mentally tough. Laboring alone at night was unlike anything I have ever experienced. But it also empowered me that I could truly do this.
In the morning my husband was in contact with my mom, who was driving down with my whole family. My dad, sister, brother-in-law, nieces, grandparents. I had originally planned and received permission for my mother, sister and grandmother to be present in the room during the birth.
Suddenly, my contractions became so incredibly painful and fast; I wasn’t sure what was happening. The nurse checked me, and I had dilated several centimeters rapidly.
Ok, great I thought. This is progressing fast; I can do this.
Next thing I remember, all the machines and monitors started beeping and suddenly my entire room is being filled up with every single maternity nurse and the doctor on call. A beautiful, tall and slender Haitian woman. I was being flipped around, placed on all fours, they were doing anything and everything to stabilize our (mine and Antonio’s) heart rate that was dropping.
“What is wrong? Is my baby ok? Is my baby ok? IS MY BABY OK?” Was all I could get out of my mouth while holding back sobs. I didn’t think of myself, because I wasn’t concerned about myself.
Isn’t that the epitome of motherhood.
“Honey, if I was worried about your baby, I wouldn’t be standing here so calmly,” she said.
I knew she was lying, my gut told me. But I appreciated her beautiful white lie, because she needed me to be calm. And, I needed her to be calm too.
And with that, she turned to my angel nurse, Janice, and quietly and calmly told her to get me to the OR immediately for an emergency cesarean. “We have to get him out in the next 30 minutes, or they both won’t make it,” I faintly hear her say to my husband.
Emotions flooded me.
I remember looking at my husband, who too, was trying to remain stoic.
My natural birth was no longer an option.
My mom was over an hour away.
Could she do this cesarean in time? I had never had major surgery or been sliced into; the unknown was wrecking me. And all I could do was pray…please God don’t let anything happen to my baby!
To be continued…
Until then, share with me! Did your birth go as planned? Were you ever made aware of the possibility of an emergency cesarean?
